When thinking of self-care the first things that may come to mind are hydrating facials and lavender infused bubble baths. Although those both sound pretty amazing, self-care is more than just a nightly pampering session. Self-care is basically what it sounds like, caring for yourself. Sounds simple, so why do so many of us seem to struggle with this concept? 

For some, self-care can be viewed as selfish. The idea of putting your needs before someone else can feel inconsiderate. However, learning and accepting the idea that it is necessary to care for yourself before you can care for anyone else is crucial.

To me, self-care is the practice of healthy living. It’s the action of being aware of the things that negatively affect your mindset and esteem. Self-care is both expressing compassion and kindness to yourself. In order to be able to express those acts of endearment, you must first figure out what is preventing you from doing so. 

If there is a form of toxicity in your life, you must be brave enough to discover where it is coming from and you must have the courage to remove yourself from it. Take a moment and think:

Is there someone in your life who is constantly speaking negativity into your space? 

Perhaps you’re in a relationship that feels onesided?

 Is your Instagram timeline dimming your self-esteem? 

Whom exactly are you comparing your life to and why? 

As someone currently undergoing a journey to self-acceptance and self-love, I understand how it feels to be trapped in a mind overflowing with thoughts that do nothing but bring you down. 

I’m still learning how to practice self-care and although I’m not always the best at giving myself the patience and positive affirmations that I need, I have begun practicing a few mechanisms that have helped. 

One of my biggest struggles is comparison. I’ve literally always compared myself to others and I hate it. Something that has helped me cope with my comparative tendencies is changing my routine. 

Every morning the first thing I would do was go on social media. As much as I love Instagram, it just wasn’t healthy for me to start my morning off comparing my life to other people. Even if we do not intend to compare ourselves to people, sometimes it just happens. When it does happen it can really impact our mood and can trigger us to overthink our existence. I love social media but once I start seeing all the influencers living it up in Mykonos, I know that’s my cue to log off. 

Something else I struggle with is feeling present in the moment. In my defense, I am a Leo so I daydream way more than I should, mostly on how I’m going to take over the world. I’m kidding… kinda. 

On a serious note, I have noticed my lack of being present in my everyday life. Sometimes it’s a little light-hearted like when I’m practicing my speech for the Grammy I’ve convinced myself I’m going to win or when I envision myself as the “super fun cool girl” in a music video. Other times it can be a little more serious like when I’m literally zoning out of conversations. I haven’t quite figured out how to combat this habit of mine, but for now, the best I can do is just snap myself out of it and try to bring myself back to reality. 

One of the biggest concepts to be aware of while practicing self-care is to identify the things that are negatively affecting your mood and mental state. For example, maybe we shouldn’t listen to sad songs when we’re sad. As simple as this idea may sound it has actually really helped my overall day to day mood. When I’m feeling sad I may allow myself to listen to breathin by Ariana Grade once and then I just have to put on my party girl playlist and dance it out. 

In reality, there are many simple ways we can practice self-care. What works for me may not work for you and that’s okay. You just need to figure out what makes you feel recharged or what gets you excited for the day. Personally, when I start my day off early with maybe a little reading and a homemade smoothie I feel great.

At the end of the day, we are human and there are going to be days where you wake up and the only thing you want to do is have a blueberry donut for breakfast and rewatch David Dobrik’s vlogs. If that’s what you need to laugh and feel happy, by all means, do it.

Self-care is a work in progress. It can get difficult because unfortunately, it can be a mind game. If you take anything away from this post, I hope you never give up. I want you all to be happy because I know how it feels to be sad and it sucks. I’m not perfect and I’m still struggling with this whole self-care thing, but I’m not giving up and neither should you. 

Thank you for reading. I’m here for you and I’m rooting for you. Feel free to comment your own self-care techniques, you just might help someone out.

Brianna.